bellflower beauty

My mom and I have set the goal to start going to more happy hours. It seems like, although happy hour may not be official in Boston, there are still a ton of bars, lounges, and restaurants in and around the city that still entertain the idea of discounted food and well-priced drinks during a certain time frame, either daily or for certain periods of time.

One of our favorite deals that we’ve experienced so far hasn’t necessarily been a happy hour, but it has been discounted food. Specifically, dollar oyster nights. We love a nice restaurant that offers fresh oysters for $1 per oyster. We’ve seen them be time and space limited. For instance, one restaurant offered dollar oysters all month. Another upscale restaurant has offered dollar oysters for patrons in the bar and lounge space of the restaurant only, for two nights per week. Another upscale restaurant has offered dollar oysters all week from 5pm until they run out of oysters. Either way, dollar oysters have been one of the most exciting deals we’ve found recently, especially since we live in New England.

My mom and I have been making it our mission to also go out to restaurants recently and to hang out at bars, so that we can check out a lot of the new spots that have opened, and to socialize and make new friends. We have always been very outgoing and had numerous friends, but we’ve recently moved to an upscale, trendy town outside of the city, and we’ve been curious about making even more friends both within the city and in our new town.

I love going out to bars, lounges, speakeasies, and restaurants. When my mom and I go out, we tend to gravitate toward the more upscale offerings. We also tend to be attracted to establishments that might be described as “new,” “trendy,” or “hip.” Whenever we hear about new places opening up in the city, especially, we love to check them out to see what the vibe is like, how the food is, and if we can grab a fun / inventive cocktail or two. It’s always nice to get a change of scenery and a change of pace by exiting our usual routine and bubble and branching out to see what is new.

Growing up through high school, and then branching out to undergrad / college in my teens and 20s, I never had a problem making friends and being surrounded by large groups of people. Usually, the easiest ways I made friends were through people I was associated with at school or people I knew through work. As I got older, and people started moving away for grad school and jobs, I had to become more creative about the ways I met people, and make more of an effort. I could no longer become best friends with the guy or girl who reached out to me from Chemistry lab or Anthropology lecture. I wasn’t just thrown into a cohort of people around my age like I was at work where we had the same interests and liked going to the same neighborhood bars.

Now, as someone in her early 30s, I’ve found it more difficult to build a friend group, or even multiple friend groups, and have them “stick.” Whether it’s because it’s harder to find more centralized, regular activities where you’re constantly surrounded by the same people, or because once you hit 30, people start splintering off and moving away, getting married, having children, it is so difficult to meet new people, socialize with them on a regular basis, and form deep connections with them.

Some great ways I’ve found to meet new people recently, in my late 20s and early 30s, have been to join “girl groups.” What I mean by that are local, Boston-based groups that I’ve found on TikTok and Instagram that host regular events like picnics, floral arrangement parties, holiday parties, book club meetings, etc., where you can meet with generally the same group of girls in the same general age range (20s-30s/40s) on a regular basis. Some of the most adventurous and rewarding things I’ve done have been through these types of groups. I love trying new things and I love meeting other people who have similar interests, so it has been fun being a member of these types of groups.

Another great way that I’ve met people has been through a city-specific book club. I’ve been a member of multiple book clubs throughout my young adulthood, and I think that they’re a great way to meet with the same group of people on a regular basis with something to talk about. Having a central topic to meet and gather about is key to ensuring that the conversation can flow naturally and avoid awkward pauses. Of course, in these groups, conversation can naturally gravitate toward members sharing more personal and casual information about themselves, which lend itself to bond-building and friendship-building, too, but it’s nice to meet to talk about a subject where you can just read a book and come with material to share.

I’m pretty sure that socializing with other people is a large part of our health and longevity as human beings, so my mom and I are constantly striving to branch out and meet new people. I love hanging out with my mom, and she feels the same way, so we have that built-in social support, but we also see the benefit in having our own friends. We’re not part of the same age group, and we don’t have all of the exact same interests, so it’s nice to meet with people that we might be able to relate to in different ways.

What are some of your favorite places to go to socialize, meet new people, and engage in the hobbies that you enjoy most? I would love to hear you share in the comments.